Avoiding Arguments with Family: Strategies for Difficult Conversations

August 29, 2025

I was quietly reading my book when I heard an escalating argument with both sides raising their voices. Curious about what was happening, I stepped in and discovered it was a family dispute centered around MAGA-related issues. My wife questioned why we have soldiers stationed in Washington, DC, while her brother claimed that crime in DC is a significant problem and that Trump would be the one to fix it. My wife cited reputable sources showing that the crime rate in DC is at its lowest point in thirty years, but her brother dismissed these facts as incorrect. We have all lived in DC, and while crime has been an issue in some parts of the city in the past, the overall rates have improved.

So, where do we go from here? Arguments like this are becoming increasingly common in our conversations. Discussions with family members often revolve around news, especially topics related to politics and current events.

Having different opinions is perfectly normal. The problem arises when individuals repeatedly make the same points without considering opposing viewpoints. Additionally, people’s beliefs tend to remain relatively stable; some are inherently opinionated and stick to their views even when presented with contradictory facts. Some individuals are misinformed rather than ignorant, often consuming news media that aligns with their beliefs. As a result, their echo chamber reinforces their existing perspectives.

As a middle child, I often find myself playing the role of mediator. Sometimes, I avoid discussing controversial subjects altogether. Other times, I share my own views, and when others disagree, I emphasize that I respect differing opinions. However, I find it frustrating when others fail to see things from my perspective or consider my viewpoint.

The key concern is how to prepare for Thanksgiving dinner with family, especially when some members may support the MAGA movement—or we believe they do. It’s essential to acknowledge that some individuals enjoy arguing, but we aim to avoid conflicts during dinner and steer clear of topics that could lead to disagreements.

One way to prevent arguments with MAGA supporters might be to avoid inviting them to family gatherings. However, this feels too extreme because we value our connection with family. If we can’t discuss current issues among ourselves, to whom can we turn for peaceful conversations? Siblings should be able to sit down together and discuss controversial topics without resorting to loud and heated exchanges.

With Thanksgiving and Christmas approaching, we’re considering whether to invite the entire family while also trying to avoid verbal conflicts. Should we include all family members and risk a confrontation, or should we exclude those likely to bring up controversial subjects? How do you handle similar situations with your family?

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